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Elemental Mind
Skipped
This Man Called Scott
Scott's Resume
Cydonia, Inc.
The Domain Game!
Essentials
Mix Tape Madness
25 Questions About Alex Massie
Links and Stuff
Contact Scott

SCOTT JASON COHEN:
IDIOT SAVANT OR MUMMALARD?


Who the hell are you?
I'm Scott J. Cohen, entrepreneur and freelance ninja! (The J stands for "jenius.")

Okay, give us that oh-so-compelling biographical data.
Birthdate: Sept. 29, 1972
Birthplace: Pontiac, Michigan
Family: One mom, one dad, one sis, one bro
Where I've Lived: Oak Park, MI; Tamarac, FL; Plantation, FL; Gainesville, FL; Plantation, FL (again - ugh); Boston, MA; Newton, MA.
So there.

Have we spoken before?
I dunno. Did you get email from sven@grove.ufl.edu? Or perhaps faust@bu.edu? Or even faust@tiac.net? If you talked to me when I was Pred, Mr. E, or any other of my early BBS handles, back away slowly - I've known you too long.

So what's the deal? What do you do?
Um...I'm a writer. And a filmmaker. And an actor. And a comedian. Of sorts.

So you get paid for this?
Oh, you're funny!

How do you make money?
The glamorous, high-stakes world of temping. For now. You're welcome to hire me. Really. You are. Please.

Are you single, you swinging little mummalard?
Nope! Not by a longshot! I am entwined, entombed, and otherwise entangled with Lena, my numero-uno gal. Sorry to disappoint you - I would have loved to see that inner tube.

Have you ever had a nude scene in a parody of Star Trek that was posted on the UF VAX cluster?
Yes. (For the record, I'm LT. SVEN.)

Do you delight in being a mummalard?
We have to be happy with the cards we're dealt, right?

Do you have anything else to say?
No.

...

Nothing at all?
Nope. I'm content. How are you?

Don't look at me.


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